Some Mothers Do 'Ave 'Em

- Season 3

(1978)

The Spencers are moving, as the council sees no other hope for the house Frank has been wrecking with his 'repairs' for years, as dramatically proven when they leave. Betty drives too fast, so the movers's van which must follow has an accident. At their new home, also council owned, neighbor Lewis soon learns sharing a house with Frank means living in a live disaster area.

Frank brings a stray dog home, and calls it Columbo. The insurance damage assessor reduces his ludicrous record moving claim to £40. In order to do some repairs and replacements himself, Frank has enlisted on a wood-shop course. His super-glue efforts manage to glue several people together including a passer-by and a naively helpful conductor - they all end up in hospital. Frank then starts on a Wendy house for Jessica but has to get it out of the building.

Frank is jealous of Betty's attention towards her neighbor, Roland Quincy, within the Scottish dance group. As chairman of the local liberal party, Roland, with Frank as secretary, stages a performance for Scottish MP MacDougall's visit, to be given by able dancers - but not Frank. However, while greeting the MP at the railway station Frank causes an accident disabling his chairman, so he gets to stand in.

Frank proves a destructive streak doesn't qualify for the demolition business, incurring a hearing impairment. Grandpa Spencer writes to announce his arrival in Britain. Dr. Mender is annoyed by Frank's frequent pointless visits, this time a present for him as his birthday is the same as Jessica's. Frank also sees him rehearse with another doctor for the hospital pantomime, but doesn't get it. A fake alert for Jessica brings each doctor in turn, pressed for time to change from the stage costumes.

Frank takes a course in motorbike riding for a courier job with dodgy Mr. Hunt, who only took him as too dumb to ask questions, but can't even find the route, and the examiner gets run over by a similarly dressed motor-biker. Even his wife Betty dreads the idea of him behind the wheel and deliveries depending on his performance. At home, Frank tries out a self-made metal detector, dreaming of finding Roman remains. At his first delivery, 'deamon king' manages to block the break, starting his usual wild ride, everywhere unsafe. At the other side of the radio, Mr. Hunt ...

Frank is all excited about the prospect of emigrating to Australia with his visiting grandpa, who is getting on Betty's nerves. First Frank demonstrates how a fence can give offense between neighbors. Next he drags Betty to Australia House, where the chief immigration officer is driven to utter despair but unable to make clear how inept Frank is, even if Betty didn't hesitate. Then a chimney-cleaning client, neighbour Lewis, and the milkman all suffer the Spencer inverse-Midas touch, whether they fight it or not.

Courtesy of granddad Spencer, who visits from Australia, Frank gets the flying lesson he always craved. Alas, an airplane is a very dangerous place for his natural clumsiness - as his instructors find out the hard way. First Frank makes a mess of babysitting Jessica and her toddler friend Alexander. Frank's maiden flight goes from bad to worse, as he inadvertently knocks instructor Barker unconscious.